(a journal for Ms. Anik, Friday 8 September 2006)
There are moments in life which are so archetipaly perfect that we want to stay as long as possible at that very moments and circumstances. Many examples of it. We might have one of our dreams come true. We might meet a lovely friend with whom we want to be accompanied until the last air we breathe. We might get a terribly surprising joy. Those are the times we do not want to miss—not even a second. Undoubtedly, we would give anything so that we will not ever lose them.
Actually, people do realize that life does not work that way. That is not how life goes. We know it so clearly that we really expect that life will not let us drawn in a cruel moment. We incredibly understand that life is not only all about happiness, but it is also about sadness, desperation, despair, and other situation of such kind.
That is why there are many people who do not like changes. They want to stay exactly the same, to stand perfectly still. They might be not happy as they expect to be; but they want to maintain the position. They say that it feels safer, somehow. If they are suffering a bit, at least the pain is familiar. They feel it is better that way rather than to have changes in their lives. They will not take the risk because if they do, who knows what other pain might be out there waiting for them. Chances are: it could be even worse.
Still, there are others who like changes. They maybe are easily bored of one situation; but the most possible reason is that they believe they can pass even the worst moment and then they will get better and better gradually. Thus, they can take their leap of faith to get out of the box, where people used to hide, to face the reality waiting for them out there.
I guess most of us prefer being in the middle. We are afraid of changes because they could just make us even worse. However, we do not want to stay the same forever. Undeniably, we need changes for the better ones. We want a better life. We want to be better in many things. Nevertheless, still we admit that we are scared since we do not know what changes the future brings us. Confusing, but it is true.
We feel it inside our hearts that we are afraid of being a different person someday we do not know. We just want that this is it the person we get to be forever. Like the song Joey McIntyre sings: “… You are meant to be the way you are exactly…” We want to—like the title of the song—stay the same. There might be one day when we meet our old friends, they say, “You’ve changed,” out of the blue. It is good if they think we are better than before. But, what if they just do not like it? It could be that they like the way we were before.
Their comments might surprise us since we, our own selves, actually do not realize that we have already changed. When we finally do change, it does not happen like an explosion so that out of the blue we become a different person. We hardly notice it, in fact. Only those—who could be our close friends—who look at us really, really close can notice the changes.
That is the point where we start to be even more pessimistic about changes than before. We start to hide ourselves more and more frequently. We begin to despise changes even more. Never have we been in such a fright of what will happen to us next.
We start becoming a coward since all we can think is that it is easier to pretend things are okay rather than to face a difficult truth. That is so; we just go through the motion, hoping that it is not too horrible.
Feedback from Miss Anik :
What a profound explanation about changes, Silvia. Anyway, where do you stand, Silvia? Do you like to be in the middle too? Everybody (or is it) everything changes. It is very natural for something to change, right? What I mean is that we change, a baby, a kid, a teenager, an adult, then.. you know the continuation. But.. are you talking about physical changes or mental changes? It seems that we might have a long discussion if we discuss about it. Honestly, I never think about changes so profoundly, until I read your ideas.
Mine:
Thank you, Ma’am. Actually, I’m not talking about changes that has something to do with growing. It could be about mental changes. The abstract ones. Ourmindsets, our styles, our ways of life, our principles, anything at all in our life affecting our life. Sometimes we will face a point where we should make a decision either to stay or move into another.
There are moments in life which are so archetipaly perfect that we want to stay as long as possible at that very moments and circumstances. Many examples of it. We might have one of our dreams come true. We might meet a lovely friend with whom we want to be accompanied until the last air we breathe. We might get a terribly surprising joy. Those are the times we do not want to miss—not even a second. Undoubtedly, we would give anything so that we will not ever lose them.
Actually, people do realize that life does not work that way. That is not how life goes. We know it so clearly that we really expect that life will not let us drawn in a cruel moment. We incredibly understand that life is not only all about happiness, but it is also about sadness, desperation, despair, and other situation of such kind.
That is why there are many people who do not like changes. They want to stay exactly the same, to stand perfectly still. They might be not happy as they expect to be; but they want to maintain the position. They say that it feels safer, somehow. If they are suffering a bit, at least the pain is familiar. They feel it is better that way rather than to have changes in their lives. They will not take the risk because if they do, who knows what other pain might be out there waiting for them. Chances are: it could be even worse.
Still, there are others who like changes. They maybe are easily bored of one situation; but the most possible reason is that they believe they can pass even the worst moment and then they will get better and better gradually. Thus, they can take their leap of faith to get out of the box, where people used to hide, to face the reality waiting for them out there.
I guess most of us prefer being in the middle. We are afraid of changes because they could just make us even worse. However, we do not want to stay the same forever. Undeniably, we need changes for the better ones. We want a better life. We want to be better in many things. Nevertheless, still we admit that we are scared since we do not know what changes the future brings us. Confusing, but it is true.
We feel it inside our hearts that we are afraid of being a different person someday we do not know. We just want that this is it the person we get to be forever. Like the song Joey McIntyre sings: “… You are meant to be the way you are exactly…” We want to—like the title of the song—stay the same. There might be one day when we meet our old friends, they say, “You’ve changed,” out of the blue. It is good if they think we are better than before. But, what if they just do not like it? It could be that they like the way we were before.
Their comments might surprise us since we, our own selves, actually do not realize that we have already changed. When we finally do change, it does not happen like an explosion so that out of the blue we become a different person. We hardly notice it, in fact. Only those—who could be our close friends—who look at us really, really close can notice the changes.
That is the point where we start to be even more pessimistic about changes than before. We start to hide ourselves more and more frequently. We begin to despise changes even more. Never have we been in such a fright of what will happen to us next.
We start becoming a coward since all we can think is that it is easier to pretend things are okay rather than to face a difficult truth. That is so; we just go through the motion, hoping that it is not too horrible.
Feedback from Miss Anik :
What a profound explanation about changes, Silvia. Anyway, where do you stand, Silvia? Do you like to be in the middle too? Everybody (or is it) everything changes. It is very natural for something to change, right? What I mean is that we change, a baby, a kid, a teenager, an adult, then.. you know the continuation. But.. are you talking about physical changes or mental changes? It seems that we might have a long discussion if we discuss about it. Honestly, I never think about changes so profoundly, until I read your ideas.
Mine:
Thank you, Ma’am. Actually, I’m not talking about changes that has something to do with growing. It could be about mental changes. The abstract ones. Ourmindsets, our styles, our ways of life, our principles, anything at all in our life affecting our life. Sometimes we will face a point where we should make a decision either to stay or move into another.
Writing is healing. Writing is capturing the moments.
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